My Beloved Sister, before I finalize on Reciprocity, I'd like to show you some guidelines for wives that I overheard some men discussing.
1. Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have be thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they get home and the prospect of a good meal is part of the warm welcome needed.
2. Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh-looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people.
3. Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.
4. Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives. Run a dustcloth over the tables.
5. During the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering to his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.
6. Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer or vacuum. Encourage the children to be quiet.
7. Be happy to see him.
8. Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him.
9. Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.
10. Don't greet him with complaints and problems.
11. Don't complain if he's late for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through at work.
12. Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or lie him down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him.
13. Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.
14. Don't ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him.
15. A good wife always knows her place.
Funny enough, only about 10% of men did not agree to all the guidelines mentioned above. From the other 90% I got to hear that "Over the years, what men expect from women have not changed. But what women expect from men have changed." This left me sober.
Are the men saying the truth? Is this good wife achievable?
23 comments:
LOL..this list is so funny...at what time will i prepare all of these e.g the meal before he comes, refresh myself??? is it when i am rushing home from work...
I think my husband will fall into the 10% o...and we are happy like that!
How u dey dia? As u can see I am still regining champion on this blog ;)
@ Aloted: You are the reigning Champion in so many blogs...except Solomonsydelle's...
You are so funny. But when I go through this list I wonder so many things? And they did not say it is for housewives only!
The one that cracks me up is "6. Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer or vacuum. Encourage the children to be quiet" what of TV?
Anyway, God will help us.
I think i am only the reigning champion on ur blog...and i like it like that :)
where i am first anywhere else..it just happened like that
kai..i dont want to read the rules again jare..they r actually annoying me...hehehehe, Make women sound like slaves.
You deserve an award actually... that was part of the reason why when you were away, ur absence was felt. Are you an early riser by the way?
These rules, you don't read them 2 times...once is enough and the message will enter...
The rules are quite funny...
I think they were written in the 1920s when most women did not work outside the home. They were at home to welcome their husbands from work in the evening, so I can assume the rules were achieveable at the time. Nowadays though, it's a very different story. Times have changed but it seems most men have not changed their expectations of wives.
When I was working full time, usually my husband arrived home at least two hours before me so most of those rules didn't apply. I'm not saying the rules themselves are bad, because they are aspirations some women may decide to work towards achieving, and I agree with #7 and #8 but I disagree with #11 and #14.
@ Favoured Girl: I agree with you, especially for your take on #11 and #14. These rules make the woman feel like second place in the home and not partner to her husband. I think these 2 rules could be refined. What do you think? And what could you suggest?
what if i get home before him and im tired? cant he be home looking nice for me? lol. there are some aspect of relationships that i try not to think about, because it enforces the fact that the man is the head of the home. in as much as i have nothing against that, there are times i just dont like it.
@Uzezi: Can he be home looking out nice for you? LOL...I think that it is not today women started not liking some of the rules...I guess that is why they keep hammering that we should be submissive...we'll keep trying our best to. How is work?
chic,
you've won an award. Pls check my blog for more details ;)
boy! do we all just make life complicated!
People are always expecting the best from others when they dont give their best...God help us
Ridiculous rules!
Must have been coined by a man,lol!
I like this one though-
*Don't greet him with complaints and problems.
Women can discuss their problems later and not at the door when their man is just returning from work.
@Afronuts: You seem like a man I should admire...always on our side...
@Princesa: Those rules were made loooong ago...I think some of them need to be amended...
What if both of you come home at the same time... ehn? Or if he comes home before I do. As is it is in our case. lol lol lol. This is ridiculous. I don't think it applies really though. Maybe I should put out questionnaires to a large group of men to see what men REALLY expect from women because most men i speak to about this don't sound this way oh. lol.
My man sure doesn't expect most of them. He'll be thankful if I do half of these but truth is we both pitch in and work towards making each other happy. We both cook and we both do the chores around the house. In fact he feeds the laundry machine nearly all the time. I hardly do...
The list goes on... lol.
I thought to add, my man is not a sissy, he is ridiculously 'manly' if there is anything like that. Love is what matters. Things tend to work themselves out when it is there. Imagine someone expecting these things from me... I'll be out the door faster than he can say 'Poetically...'!!!! Na wa oh. Why now eh? Why Rita, you know this is the subject I can't keep away from. In fact after the last post in my PMS series I will start another based on this your post alone! WHAT?! If this is what men really think someone has to tell them how things really ARE.
An old friend sent me this as a mail some years back and all I said was "some rules!"
I very much agree with rule number 10.
Hubby fits into the about 10% of men. Thank God for that!
@Poeticallytinted: Please put up the post to find out what men expect from women…especially in this day and age…
I would consider your man a real man, if he does the things you say he does…
@Dee!: I’m beginning to think the 10% is increasing…And it will be good if that’s true…Let Poeticallytinted do the post and we will see the results...
Hmmm, "Don't....question his....integrity." but, why will a lady (or vice-versa) question his (or her) integrity?
Was there no trust (the foundation of relationships) at the onset?
@ Rethots: I'm not quite sure why they will give such a tip, but here are my few kobos...
Like you rightly wondered, there may not have been trust on the onset...or over time, there has been cause to doubt his integrity...
LOL, well, if he has enough money that lets me sit home and not work. This is a possibility. If not, we would have to alternate taking off the shoes...lol
@Omosewa: You are so funny...
Men...this list is scary o. Honestly, I don't agree with a lot of the things there and even if I did, they are almost unachievable. Whatever happened to partnership? this sounds more like an Owner-Slave relationship.
Hey Amaka...which one is owner-slave...LOL...
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